Went out with junhao again today.
emo-ed for the whole day sia X_X
then he there keep trying to cheer me up but also like no use like that.
feel so bad for him lol =X

Walked around j8 today..
nothing to shop also.
Everything in Singapore is like all the same >.>
YAY i treated him Kfc today -.-
eh! it's an accomplishment okayy?
So nan de junhao will accept treats from people LOL

Okay, officially having a new start all over again.
I should be happy? Idk.
Sat at Macs listening to ipod then hear what song also cry sia =_=
i'm damn useless. rawr.
Junhao say everyone around us thought he bully me then i cry.
LOL. sowwwiiee~ i didn't mean to, really D:
I'm lucky to have at least someone i know by my side.
can't imagine if i'm alone at home =.= womg.

Sighs, mummy calling me pack my room again T_T
I HATE PACKING D: AND WHY TODAYYYYYY~
i really did loved u and i'm still missing u everyday.
but i guess that's how far we can go?
i'm waiting for that day where i'll be able to really forget everything.

found the lyrics of this two songs in my file just now while packing.
they shall be my Favs for this week? haha


再见萤火虫 by 袁耀发
作词:火溟日 作曲:Collin
我在风中 随着你摆头
跌跌碰碰活在黑暗中
困在迷梦中握在你手中
同一片天空与你相逢

凝望夜空闪动
将你的爱握在手中
就让微风附和在泪中
随着呼吸落在你心中

在我飞往另一片蓝色天空
让我化作一只守护萤火虫
让你黑暗中看到我的笑容
让你看到我光芒降落在你怀中

愿我能找到另一片魄天空
让我送你一只守护萤火虫
再多一秒钟 再多给一秒钟
让我再多陪一分钟
再见吧萤火虫

我在梦中看到的不同
从前的痛飘进我梦
过去的迷梦和你的面容是多么冲动那么激动

凝望夜空闪动
将你的爱握在手中
就让微风附和在泪中
随着呼吸落在你心中

带我飞往另一片蓝色天空
让我化作一只守护萤火虫
让你黑暗中看到我的笑容
让你看到我光芒降落在你怀中

愿我能找到另一片魄天空
让我送你一只守护萤火虫
再多一秒钟 再多给一秒钟
让我再多陪一分钟



亲爱的你在哪里 by 袁耀发
作词： 稻草人 作曲： 稻草人

我最亲爱的你怎么了别不吭一声就离开
作词： 稻草人 作曲： 稻草人
这样我会不知所措
如果我真的犯了不可原谅的错
请直接告诉我我还可以能够为你做甚么

亲爱的你在哪里 哦在哪里
在哪里怎么能放弃
才好不容易费尽力气
我们才终于在一起

亲爱的你在哪里 哦在哪里在哪里
别轻言放弃早和你约定
不管哪里
不用怕有我一直在陪你

我最亲爱的你怎么了
别不吭一声就离开
这样我会不知所措
如果我真的犯了不可原谅的错
请直接告诉我
我还可以能够为你做甚么

亲爱的你在哪里 哦在哪里
在哪里怎么能放弃
才好不容易费尽力气
我们才终于在一起

亲爱的你在哪里 哦在哪里在哪里
别轻言放弃
早和你约定不管哪里
不用怕有我一直在陪你
如果分开是上天注定
喔别在抱怨你自己无能为力

亲爱的你在哪里 哦在哪里 在哪里
怎么能放弃
才好不容易费尽力气
我们才终于在一起

亲爱的你在哪里 哦在哪里在哪里
别轻言放弃
早和你约定不管哪里
不用怕有我一直在陪你

came home at 4+am yesterday.. X_x
went to hospital with mummy for checkup in the afternoon
WOMG, WE WAITED FOR LIKE 4 HOURS+?!
Dint' know that the hospital was sooooo uber "popular" >.>

phone died so took mummy's phone.
wahpiang, i hate nokia phones -.-
Sending one message was like sooooooo lag.
Oh, and there's this Jiahao guy in audi.
He lives like just one bus stop away from me only luuuuhhhhh
=D=D=D=D LOL.
First time know people live soo near to me de xD

Went to look for junhao after hospital at cineleisure.
and we went movie marathon-ing. LOL
cause i go there see see,
soo many i want watch de luh! xD
=.= how come the last time i go with him is like NOTHING interesting to watch.
rawr!
Wahaha, he paid everything again >.>
Gosh, he's just fucking rich -.-
Luckily junhao was wearing a jacket..
inside soo uber cold can? or maybe its because we watch two movies LOL
I was messaging and my hands were like trembling~~~~~

After that went for overnight KBox until 6 that one,
or whatever its called.
'cause christina they all come find us and wanted to sing song.
Wahlao, they go inside where got sing song =___=
all drinking beer and playing sia x.x
jiao huai xiao hai zi D: lolol
so in the end only me and wenhui singing -.-
And for some STUPID reasons, wenhui kept singing 我爱的人 -faints-

Couldn't take the sleepiness so went off at 3 plus.
Wah i tell junhao then his face suddenly black sia -.-
so scary~
but anyway, he also fetch me and wenhui go home. LOL
Wenhui got off at paya lebar then after she got off hor,
the taxi driver talk talk talk non-stop sia.
I want to sleep for a while also cannot =.=
Reached my house after like 999 hours..
actually wanted to go meet jiahao de..
cause he also at his house de void deck there
then junhao insisted want see me go up wth -.-
Rawr! okay la, also wei le wo hao maa~ =[

Didn't know he can be quite sweet at times too lol
he looked like those joker joker type,
then people will bash him up that kind
actually a.k.a, qian bian de. LOL
had lotsa fun tho xD

wanted to pei jiahao audi for a while de la,
cause i promised him i'll go find him tonight LOL
then in the end also never.
he also uber bored at void deck.
and i was very sleepy le so never lor.
Sowwwwiee~ =[

Hmm, tomorrow's book out day?
i should end off everything huh?
Had a dream today morning, or just now?
everything went back to normal and i was happy in that dream.
-.-
Dreams. hurhur.
Well, i'll pretend that nothing has happened and continue being happy with him.
and that is IF i even get a reply.
Pathetic huh?
How did i become so pathetic, i wonder.

一直很安静 by 阿桑

空荡的街景
想找个人放感情
做这种决定
是寂寞与我为邻

我们的爱情
像你路过的风景
一直在进行
脚步却从来不会为我而停

给你的爱一直很安静
来交换你偶尔给的关心
明明是三个人的电影
我却始终不能有姓名

你说爱像云
要自在飘浮才美丽
我终于相信
分手的理由有时候很动听

给你的爱一直很安静
我从一开始就下定决心
以为自己要的是曾经
却发现爱一定要有回音

给你的爱一直很安静
除了泪在我的脸上任性
原来缘分是用来说明
你突然不爱我这件事情

just had a shower. whoa refreshing~ =D
decided to pon tomorrow de class barbeque. =X
cause after going hospital should be abit late le bah,
If junhao still out walking then go find him lor..
anyway, i havent seen him ever since we went out like months ago -.-

was playing Ams in the afternoon lol
met some old friends, and yay! everyone's coming back XD

i know im missing him tho.
and its past his lights out again.
i should set things back like before again huh?

Morning! I'm bored early in the morning -.-
Played audition till 4am+ yesterday O_o
but didn't feel tired at all when i go offline lolol
Two more days to his block leave =.=
whatever.

Going hospital on friday then having class barbeque after that.
but received Junhao's sms in the morning to go out on friday with him and the others -.-
whoa, suddenly so busy T_T
Soo... barbequeq = pangseh jh.
Go out = pangseh class + save 8-10$ LOL
see my mood first luh okay? =D
but go out confirm he will ask this ask that so most probably i'll ps him.
LOL. ^^
alright, gonna go audition again since i'm fking bored.

GOT PANGSEH-ED BY MICHELLE TAN YING TING TODAY.
lol. whoa. so big sia. haha
Okay, so michelle forgot to she had to send her friend off today -.-
Heng yol never say she dont want go liao ;D

Hmm, met yol at kebangan then went to Marina Square.
wanted to watch the chihuahua movie but eventually,
we ended up at Kbox after we walked past it. LOL
So we sing sing sing till 5pm.
whoa okay didn't believe yol that 我爱的人 is saddening at first,
then sing halfway jiu.......
and right after that song was 我不难过 =__=
bullshit. lol. where got 不难过 >.>
Had fun tho :D

BUT BUT BUT I TELL U
MARINA SQUARE SERVICE DAMN BAD SIA.
Nobody to bring you in to your room de.
and there is like turn turn turn and turn, like maze like that.
And we ended up in a ulu corner of Kbox. =.=
the time slot was from 2-5pm too.
actually is till 7pm de lor.. dont know why become 5pm

walked to Suntec after that ..
went in Toy'R'Us to see if got empty job slot.
asked the person at the customer service then she straight away give us -______- face
=( so fieeerrrceee~

wanted to go eat the egg tarts there and see got what thing can buy..
shun bian buy yol's bling bling. lol
kk la, the egg tarts quite nice xD
I ate orange chocolate and mushroom chicken egg tart.
was expecting orange or something at the bottom but in the end also dont have -.-
only have the chicken underneath lol
but not bad not bad :D

went to the arcade too.
OMG THE CHIP AND DALE SO BIIIIIGGGGGGG lol
two jackpot prize from the push-sweets machine -.-
saw the DDR machine in a ulu corner sia
Sighs. ddr again >.>

after that we jaywalked from tower five to tower one,
then from tower one there jay back again.
we keep crossing those BIG BIG roads luhhh =X
then got this China woman ask us where is bus 36.
HENG I JUST NOW BEFORE JAY I SAW THE BUS STOP STAND SEE WHAT BUSES ARE AVAILABLE. LOL

Went back walk walk to buy some stuff at marina again.
applied at the jigsaw world or whatever for sales assistant.
SO MANY APPLICATIONS -.-
but i think me and yol will have a chance?
'Cause we're like almost everyday can work,
then the application before us only can work on sat and public holiday.
how to fight with us like that? heh xD

saw those cute monkeys EVERYWHERE.
Gosh.
Why can't i stop thinking about him -.-

Decided to go pasir ris and buy some earrings. LOL
yep, we travelled half of Singapore today.
Kebangan>City Hall>Pasir Ris. o_o
Went to arcade after that and played bishi bashi.
MY SKILLS DROPPED T_T
everytime also i last D:
Then Yol saw her friend Serene at the Hall of Fame there.
cause we have to take a picture after we finish the game lolol
Some guys were looking at us play la,
and yol thinks that we looked like pros to them. =D

after that was DAYTONA!! =D
HAH MICHELLE, WE WENT DAYTONA-ING XD
okay -.- skills dropped too lol
could only make a few successful drifts.

bought bubbletea and sat bus 17 home and
YAY YOLANDA PEI ME SIT BUS HOME =D
chatted and there was this couple who sat infront of us
cause me and yol were talking about audi hacks etc.
think they also got play ba haha
Alright, gonna play audi later on.

Thank you yol for pei-ing me whole day! ;D
Had lots of fun today =D
AT LEAST BETTER THAN THAT MICHELLE TAN.
lol, okay la. Don't bully michelle, later she call and scold me D:
Whoa i pangseh-ed my audi friend for 3 straight days.
Feel so guilty... lol he ditched his ex-gf for me then i pangseh-ed him for three days sia =X
Alright, i'm still gonna go try out that audition hack. haha

Oh, and my laptop needs to be sent in for repairs probably.
Since i can't use my up and down arrow as well as that / (opp of this) button. -.-
Hai~

It's past his lights off time again.
Nothing happened, as expected.
Just realised today that Jay Chou was the composer of this song
LOL.

我爱的人 by 陈小春
作词:施人诚 作曲:周杰伦

我知道故事不会太曲折
我总会遇见一个什么人
陪我过没有了她的人生
成家立业之类的等等

她做了她觉得对的选择
我只好祝福她真的对了
爱不到我最想要爱的人
谁还能要我怎样呢

我爱的人 不是我的爱人
她心里每一寸 都属於另一个人
她真幸福 幸福得真残忍
让我又爱又恨 她的爱怎么那么深

我的爱人 她已有了爱人
从他们的眼神 说明了我不可能
每当听见 她或他说「我们」
就像听见爱情 永恆的嘲笑声

因为爱, 所以爱 by 謝霆鋒
作词:林夕 作曲:謝霆鋒

不是为了什么回报，所以关怀。
不是为了什么明天，所以期待。
因为我是一个人，只能够对感觉坦白。
只是为了你一句话，我全身摇摆。

只是为了一个笑容，爱就存在。
那些想太多的人，有生之年都不会明白。

因为爱，所以爱，温柔经不起安排。
愉快那么快，不要等到互相伤害。
因为爱，所以爱，感情不必拿来感慨。
谁也不用给我一个美好时代，我要你现在。

只是为了你一句话，我全身摇摆。
只是为了一个笑容，爱就存在。
那些想太多的人，有生之年都不会明白。

因为爱，所以爱，温柔经不起安排。
愉快那么快，不要等到互相伤害。
因为爱，所以爱，感情不必拿来感慨。
谁也不用给我一个美好时代，我要你现在。
谁也不用给我一个美好时代，我要你现在。

imy.

why am i waking up so early everyday -___-
trying to get used to no unread messages in the morning,
hmm, i'm doing well :D -clap claps-

Going out with michy and yol later on. Whoooooooooots!
Heng they today free sia -.- but qm....
hai~ think she have photography? or what? idk lolol
gonna catch a movie later on..
almost went to cine sia x_x

Mhm, trying to keep myself as occupied as possible.
Oh! JOB!
GIMME SOME JOB LOBANGS FOR TWO OR THREE PEOPLE DE! =D

Random clicks on Youtube:


Hyori and Miyeon are criminals because they killed their lovers. The guy is their friend. After they come out of jail, they start bounty hunting and turn the people they caught into the police to receive money. When Hyori was hit in the head with the bottle, Miyeon killed a person. Because they work together, they would all go to jail. The police at the end were checking cars for them. They had nowhere to go & they didnt wanna go to jail again. They decide to kill themselves.(this is based on the film "Thelma & Louise.")

Full story version:

yep. just came back from school.
Just realised that no matter how hard i try to smile
i just cant smile from deep within.
there's ALWAYS something there preventing me from wanting to smile.
Wow it took me months the other time to really give it up.
I wonder how long would it take this time round.
Just can't comprehend and i have no ways to get my answers. Haha?

So.. i'm lost?
Guess so.
a new habit for me to have something to wait for.
a simple message would be enough,
even if the message have just one or two words.
Habits are hard to change,
which makes it soo fucking hard to stop thinking about it =_=
Gosh, can someone just knock me out.

Whenever i'm occupied with friends or chats on phone,
i'm just alright.
Whenever i'm alone,
i'll start thinking about it again. >.>
@$(*&^%$ew#@!##%^&%
URGH.

Had an unknown message yesterday night after i slept,
actually it was from Zen. >.>
Didn't know it was Zen at first and when he said that his name had three letters,
i stared at my phone for a moment.
Somewhere, i was hoping that it was him,
even tho it doesn't even sound like him.
Just how silly can i get?

I wonder if he even thought of me whenever he have free time or before he sleeps.
Hurhur.

Girl, just forget EVERYTHING.
isn't it obvious enough?
Rejected calls from zw today.
i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry.
But i really don't want to talk about anything related to him at that moment.
somehow, he found out that i had a new blog.
and yea, about him.
Sighs.

Thanks Joel.
sounds weird saying this but yea..
you made me laugh. lol
I can't say my thanks to you over the phone,
i'll sound stupid. -.-

Okay, i'm having mood swings right now,
that's why everything is happening the way it is, right?
-.-
Whatever. Just shut the fuck up wanchin.

another day passed. silence.
fuck. can't i just stop thinking about it?
you're useless girl.

Its funny how things turn out in life -laughs?-
Someone whom i thought i forgot about, who have disappeared for weeks or even months,
appeared out of nowhere could even tell that i'm feeling down and cheer me up.
Someone whom i care about right now, is ignoring everything, which makes me feel so silly just because i was worried sick that something had happened to him.
In the end, it was just because that someone probably didn't want to face it? or even me?
Haha, i laughed.

Paranoid? Perhaps. It just happened for such a fucking short period of time.
I've always thought being truthful was the most important matter.
Even if things just don't go right at any point in time,
isn't saying out what's wrong the correct thing to do?
Maintaining silence isn't gonna help.
What's worse are the days of absolute separation.
Maybe i won't even get an answer? Let's just pray and hope..
what else could have been done huh?

Lack of communication; a subject totally worth to explore into.
at least, I've tried.
Perhaps it's karma that i'm going through all these?
Well, i've ignored zw calls..
but after that, AT LEAST i tried to ask what's needed.
He replied. Just wanted to ask me how i was.
Should i be glad? I wonder.

I could have taken another choice and chose to ignore completely,
afterall we promised to not have anymore contact with each other?
Stupidity perhaps.
But it was all thanks to stupidity that let me know what he's thinking about,
or rather, clear his doubts and get things back to the track.

Why in the fuck did i do that? No reasons.
Just because i know the feeling of being casted away at a side,
and being worried if that someone is safe and sound, when her herself knows that its being silly to think about such stuff but just can't stop herself from thinking about it.
And last but not least, to not even get a chance to clear up EVERYTHING.

Oh wow, and now she sounds pathetic just by looking back at what she've been doing.
It's funny too, how things that are almost the same are happening so coincidentally.
She even knows that everything would probably take a fucking long time to reach the other side.
What about all those promises huh?
She's desperate to keep her promise of being understanding.
but He just don't give a chance for this to happen.
Whatever.

Just hope things get right. Someday.

fuck that. just tell me straight in the face what you want.

Mhm, just had a shower.. waiting for time to pass and go for school
Feel like smsing him but well, he should be asleep ba.
Scared later phone vibration wake him up.
Just let him sleep more lor.. today booking in le D:

Well had some missed calls from zw after i slept. o_O
But never return his call lol
If there's something important, he'll call again right?
So... yup why bother to return call.

Having cramps today. oww T_T
hmm, hope can see him later on. yep.
Bye. AFK to school >.>

Aye aye, decided to create another blog for myself after 8341231 years.
Woke up in the morning and went to look for dear.
Met him at cck lot1 de arcade; he was playing ddr ._.
I never knew bedok to cck will take 50 minutes sia and i count liao, 23 stops.
=O
So ubbbbbbbeeer bored on mrt but at least got his messages pei me ^^
Today de mrt also dont know what thing wrong; Keep moving and stopping out of nowhere.
Think because the train run too fast liao ba, run infront of schedule -.-

Okay reached there, first thing see them liao. all botaks. lol
Watched him play..at first wanted to play arcade bball de sia but nvm lol.
Hmm, then went Kfc and drank pepsi.
I also dont know why i say coke when he ask me what i want.
lmao >.> (theres no coke in Kfc de la dummie) ._.
Well, felt a little awkward cause normally is zw buy what i drink what lol -.-
Hmm sat down and listened to him and his buddy uhh Sinyu? or Xinyu idk la lol. then they chat about army stuff.
Not really bored but okay la very funny lol.
Hmm then took LRT back to his house for him to change clothes.
Yep, went inside his house..look here look there lor
Don't know why everyone's house so comfy like that
My house like antique house like that, so... uncomfortable and dead lol.
Everywhere also the brown wood =.=
Hmm, got reminded when i first stepped into zw's house haha
I almost killed his dog can? =O
Scary~ no wonder his dog everytime see me jiu run T_T
Actually i don't know if we're like abit too fast?
idk la ;_;
Saw his sister patting his niece to sleep cause she was crying like mad while she was talking on the phone
Felt so bad for his niece~ Cry until voice like wanna break liao. Hai, kids D:

Went out and decided to take bus to Orchard.
First time taking BUS to Orchard sia, everytime also take train de.
Sometimes i really wonde rif all those things we did will bring back memories for him. =X
Mmhm still awkward i guess? We barely spoke. -.-
Think he must have felt this way too lor even tho he never say.
Perhaps he tired after DDR la. Dont wanna think about it.
Decided to go cine and watch movie
Went there, actually want madagascar 2 de but i never watch 1 before Still remembered I bought like two whole packets then his sore throat still never recover. Cough worsened somemore >.>
But hai~ he cough until like very jialat. =(

Somehow, i don't have the feeling that we're together?
Just like uhhhhhhh.. idk.. going out with a someone who is actually supposed to be closest to me.
Saw couples here and there.. no comments.
Went LJS and ate. Well, i still remember how we used to like LJS, urgh. =_=
A new start girl! Sighs.

Walked around and shopped for a shirt.
Hmm.. Wanted to take neoprint but nvm ba.
Went over to taka, outside raining... Walked under the rain.
Was supposed to eat dinner with his ma and jie but whatever ba
it's troublesome for him to send me home also since we're at like different poles of Singapore.
and thus, i initated to go home myself then he go look for his family.
Said a simple, "Bye bye." -.-
Missed him abit for what i just did but i think that's the best for everyone
cause i think he will send me home la but really very far plusss
he got straight bus go back home.
Actually i also have luh i think, bus no.7 and 14 but didn't feel like saying.

Really want to send him off tomorrow after the funeral thing...
Hmm, still waiting for his reply.
Went and bought lozenges for him to bring into camp for tomorrow.
Don't know if can bring in or not sia x.x
Come back home still got the Shandong trip stuff to do. S-I-A-N.
Reflections, IF project, GENERAL PAPER READING LOGS sia.
OMGLDJWKJDNFASKDWEKJRADWTFMAN.

Mhm, gotta go school tomorrow morning.
Apparently one of the school directors, Mr Tan Ching Gay or Gey's father died.
So qiao sia. Come back from Shandong then he die ._.
Okay, i sound disrespectful but yea..
'Cause Mr Tan hosted us with a UBER SUMPTOUS meal (yea, i mean it. it's heavenly.) in Shandong when he heard that our school got people go there. (tho we had to go to his factory EnGro or something to view for no reasons -.- their like making cement there? what has it gotta do with us sia? Still report to us their annual income, expenses all those etc. =.=)
Yep, expected this funeral thing to be uber boring.

Not sure if there's interview tomorrow or not.
Sian-ded.
Well, I seriously don't believe age matters but well idk.
Didn't have problems in the past lmao.
Sighs. I don't know.
Yup, mood swings of the month again.
I don't really have mood swings but.. idk.
weird. lol
Hoping that everything is alright i guess?
.__________.